Cute, cute, cute!

Author Unknown:


Grandparents:

 

 

 

1. She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup,
under

 

the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she’d

 

done many times before. After she applied her lipstick
and

 

started to leave, the little one said, "But
Gramma, you

 

forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will
probably never

 

put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing
the toilet paper

 

good-bye….

 

 

 

 

2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me
Happy

 

Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him,
62.

 

My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked,

 

"Did you start at 1?"

 

 

 

 

3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a
grandmother

 

changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and
proceeded to

 

wash her hair.. As she heard the children getting more
and

 

more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally,
she

 

threw a towel around her head and stormed into their
room,

 

putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she
left the

 

room, she heard the three-year-old say with a
trembling voice,

 

"Who was THAT?"

 

 

 

4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter
what

 

her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside

 

on a pond I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from
a

 

tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked
wild

 

raspberries in the woods." The little girl was
wide-eyed,

 

taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure
wish I’d gotten to

 

know you sooner!"

 

 

 

 

5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked,

 

"Grandma, do you know how you and God are
alike?" I

 

mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how
are we

 

alike?” "You’re both old," he replied.

 

 

 

 

6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her

 

grandfather’s word processor. She told him she was

 

writing a story. "What’s it about?" he
asked.

 

"I don’t know," she replied. "I can’t
read."

 

 

 

 

7. I didn’t know if my granddaughter had learned her

 

colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point
out

 

something and ask what color it was.. She would tell
me and

 

was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued.
At

 

last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma,
I think

 

you should try to figure out some of these,
yourself!"

 

 

 

 

8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation
cabin,

 

we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep
from

 

attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies
followed us in.

 

Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered,
"It’s no use Grandpa.

 

Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with
flashlights."

 

 

 

 

9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I
teasingly

 

replied, "I’m not sure."

 

"Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he
advised, "mine says

 

I’m 4 to 6."

 

 

 

 

10. A second grader came home from school and said to
her

 

grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how
to

 

make babies today." The grandmother, more than a
little

 

surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That’s
interesting," she said,

 

"how do you make babies?"

 

"It’s simple," replied the girl. "You
just change ‘y’ to ‘i’ and add

 

‘es’."

 

 

 

 

11. Children’s Logic: "Give me a sentence about a

 

public servant," said a teacher. The small boy
wrote:

 

"The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The

 

teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don’t

 

 you know what pregnant means?" she asked.

 

 "Sure," said the young boy
confidently. ‘It means

 

 carrying a child."

 

 

 

 

12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to

 

their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past.

 

Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a
Dalmatian dog.

 

The children started discussing the dog’s duties.

 

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one
child.

 

"No," said another. "He’s just for good
luck."

 

 A third child brought the argument to a
close.."They use

 

 the dogs," she said firmly, "to find
the fire hydrants."

 

 

 

 

13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived.

 

"Oh," he said, "she lives at the
airport, and when we want

 

her, we just go get her.. Then, when we’re done having
her

 

visit, we take her back to the airport."

 

 

 

 

14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches
me good

 

good things, but I don’t get to see him enough to get
as smart

 

as him!

 

 

 

 

15. My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over;
you

 

 hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog.

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Published in: on February 17, 2010 at 10:27 pm  Leave a Comment  

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